The story of the young French woman Ali Leonardi opens up a very deep debate about motherhood. At 19, she became pregnant with her daughter Nina, a process she had not planned because she suffered from endometriosis and was undergoing medical treatment.
Despite her efforts to connect with the baby, from the very first moment she felt that she was unable to develop a maternal instinct. “I have the feeling that I gave birth for someone else.”, she confessed later, explaining that she felt more like a surrogate mother than a real mom.
The origin of this distance came from her childhood, marked by family abuse. Ali had a deep fear of repeating those patterns with Nina. When the financial situation and the girl’s constant crying overwhelmed her, she decided to prioritize her daughter’s well-being.
In 2022, she signed the final relinquishment of her parental rights so that the little girl could be adopted by the foster family that cared for her with love.
In 2023, Ali published the book to make her reality visible and break the taboo surrounding women who do not wish to be mothers. Although Nina is now growing up happily in a safe environment, the author’s life ended prematurely when she died in 2024 at just 25 years old.
Her case invites reflection on mental health, social pressure in child-rearing, and the painful act of letting go out of love. What do you think about her decision?